Yes, that's right. Today's post is about that show of shows, that classic of comedic television, Mad About You. I love this show. Its just stinking funny. I'm not quite sure why I love it so much. Maybe its the fact that its the story of newlyweds making their way through life. Whatever the reason, this show just tickles me. If you've never seen it, you don't know what you're missing. So this morning as I got M up to feed her breakfast, I thought, "I'd like to watch something funny." That's when I went to my old standby. Old reliable. Something familiar, and yet sure to make me laugh - Mad About You, Season One. I turned on an episode called "The Apartment." - This just happens to be one of my husband's favorite episodes because you find out that Paul has been subletting his old apartment to none other that Kramer from Seinfeld! It makes for pretty funny television!
Anyway, this blog is supposed to be about some "pearl of wisdom," so lets just get to the story and what I learned from it. The episode has Paul and Jamie arguing over the fact that Paul still hasn't given up the apartment that he lived in before they married. He says "Its crazy to give up a rent-controlled apartment" (even though he's not making any profit on the rent), but Jamie just sees it as a sign that he's not fully invested in their marriage - that he's keeping a place on the side "just in case things don't work out." And so, she begins. Begins what, you ask. What women have been doing so perfectly for centuries - nag. She tells him how horrible he is, that she would NEVER do something so thoughtless to him, blah, blah, blah. You know the drill. If you're like me, then you've done it to your husband.
Paul eventually gives in and begrudgingly agrees to give up the apartment (leading to a pretty hilarious scene between Paul and Kramer). But that's not good enough for Jamie. She wants him to want to give up the apartment. And until he does, she's not gonna let this thing go.
So, what's so interesting about this episode and the fact that I watched it this morning? Well, not 20 minutes earlier I had been doing my Bible study on "The Counter-culteral Woman" - a wonderful study by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. While discussing Proverbs 31:27 ("She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness."), Nancy explained that a wife's job is to be watchful over her house, her family, etc and to warn her husband if need be. Then Nancy said the words that are still burnt into my brain,
"Now that doesn’t mean you nag him about it. It doesn’t mean you’re the Holy Spirit in his life. You think before you say it, and you wait to see if it’s God’s time and make sure you’re perceiving it correctly. But as you’re watchful, you’re being a helper to your husband; you’re being a helper to your family."
Wait a minute! I'm not the Holy Spirit in my husband's life??? That's right! There's only one Holy Spirt, and He doesn't need me interfering with His job. He can handle it.
That's what Jamie was trying to be in this episode - Paul's Holy Spirit. She wanted to interfere with his thought process, convict him that what he was doing was wrong, but it didn't work. It never does! Have you ever nagged your husband over and over to do something, only to have him do it with a bad attitude? I have. And then what happens? Well, I usually get mad at him and say, "Well, if you're not going to do it with a good attitude, then don't do it at all!" All the while, he's probably thinking, "How am I supposed to have a good attitude when you won't stop nagging!"
You see, nagging NEVER works. That's right! I said it! My husband may end up doing what I want him to do, but NEITHER ONE OF US ends up happy. When I think of nagging, I think of a word used in the Bible - "contentious." (Wow! Two posts in a week about being a contentious wife! Do you think God's trying to tell me something???) Anyway, Proverbs 27:15 says, "A continual dripping on a day of violent showers and a contentious woman are alike." There's an image that comes to mind when I hear the phrase "continual dripping" - water torture. In other words, its like torture to live with a contentious/nagging wife - and it could very well drive a husband insane!
Lord, please help me to be a loving wife, not a nagging wife. Help me to be a watchful wife, warning my husband of things in our life that need attention, and then stepping back and letting the Holy Spirit do His work without my interference. Amen.
Well, that's it. That's how God brought my Bible study AND the Buchmans together to teach me a lesson on being a godly wife. Now, lets see if I can put that into practice! :)
By the way, if you're interested in Nancy Leigh DeMoss's study on "The Counter-culteral Woman," here's the link:
http://www.reviveourhearts.com/topics/series.php?series=187&topic_name=Biblical%20Womanhood
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